Big things happen. Some big things are bad. So are many of their consequences.

In their aftermath, going from day to day can be challenging. Though a number of such consequences relate to state of mind, many do not. The real world pragmatic impact of disaster and adversity must also be addressed. How we proceed in these tasks may change how we see ourselves. Perhaps for the good: we find resilience we didn’t know we had, and adjust our self-view accordingly.

But change takes getting used to. Is this really me? How do I hang on to any sense of “me”-ness, when the world that shaped and supported me has crumbled? Must I find something else big, some heavy-duty effort, to compete with the impact of major adversity?

Not really. It’s the little things that bring us back.

A flame glows within each of us, one that cannot be extinguished by external events. We can lose sight of it during major adversity because so much else must be addressed. Through our senses, self-awareness reengages: the scent of honeysuckle, a colorful sunrise, a baby’s laughter, the warmth of the sun, the softness of a pussycat’s fur – all of these are paths back to selfhood.

Taking our time along such pathways increases the benefit. Pleasurable sensations are always there to be had. The trick is to stop and take notice. Describing these sensations to ourselves when they occur and expressing gratitude helps the experience linger.

As the feeling inevitably fades, consider cementing your new piece of healing with a brief loving kindness meditation:

May I be safe. May I be happy. May I be healthy. May I live with ease.

You deserve it.

For more see “How to Practice Loving Kindness Meditation” by Verywell.